Lost Tapes | A Yuletide Holiday Special
Kimmy Hammons  •  Aloreing Podcast Episode • 2/28/2023

Happy Holidays Campers! To celebrate the lovely holiday season we have a bonus Yuletide episode just for you. This week both Kimmy and Ryan will be discussing some fun Yule Traditions, How our 12 Days of Krampus Social Media Event went, and read a special poem as a gift from us to you. We hope you enjoy this episode of Aloreing, oh and remember campers, passively aggressively give mistletoes, and if you don’t have a fireplace go build a cabin in the woods, drag a tree inside and do 12 days of Yule Log in a wood cabin in the woods.

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Twas the Night before Krampus

Twas the end of the 12 Days of Krampus when all through the campgrounds,

Not a cryptid was stirring, not even a HellHound.

 

The cryptids and campers were getting all cozy and warm,

Because there was going to be a light winter storm.

 

So wood was added to campfires burning bright,

That way the flames could last the long winter’s night.

 

And before they headed to sleep tonight,

Bottles of Schnapps were placed outside of their cabins and tents in delight.

 

Then the Aloreing campers hunkered in their sleeping sacks,

Even Camp Counselor Mothman got to close his eyes and relax.

 

The snow storm came in quite a hurry,

But no need to worry, it was only a flurry.

 

Followed was the sound of hooves crunching on the snow,

As the clanking of chains began to echo and grow.

 

A demonic growl followed by the sound of his treads, 

But the campers didn’t feel any sense of dread.

 

They knew it was Krampus coming to bring toys,

And he would only take the bad girls, theys and boys.

 

But while the campers and cryptids rested,

Two podcasts hosts stayed awake because of a quest.

 

Kimmy was hoping to see if Krampus was as hot as they say,

For that surely would make her day.

 

Ryan, had another plan in mind,

He was going to get a picture of Krampus clearly defined.

 

Ryan set up his camera as they both drank some Schnapps,

To pass the time they even started talking about the Aloreing Alignment chart.

 

Then Kimmy said how Krampus is just misunderstood,

And the two placed bets on whether he is evil or good.

 

Then after debating for an hour or more,

The two suddenly heard a wicked goat’s laughter behind the door.

 

They sprang off the couch as quickly as they could,

Having the floorboards squeak since they were made of old wood.

 

The two then peaked out the windows with curious delight,

Looking past the flickering campfires throughout the campsite.

 

And there he was in all his red flag glory,

Drinking while placing gifts from his woven basket inventory.

 

Now though he was buzzed, Krampus moved very quick,

But not to worry cause Ryan was slick.

 

With a high quality camera at the ready,

Ryan knew to get a good picture he had to keep his hand steady.

 

Then with soft click there was a bright flash,

Old Krampus smirked as he made a great dash.

 

Now this was the moment, to see if the photo came through,

The two looked at the camera screen to review.

 

Then they gasped, the photo was obscure!

Ryan had too many Schnapps and forgot to change the camera’s exposure.

 

Now feeling defeated, there was a knock at the cabin’s door.

There were gifts from Krampus that weren’t there before!

 

They quickly went and opened their gifts with delight,

It was two high quality signed photos of Krampus, one naughty and one nice.

 

The two then heard the sounds of Krampus cackles

He then appeared as he shook his shackles.

 

He then opened some Schnapps and took a big swig,

Then chanted the following while beating someone with a twig.

 

“Merry 12 Days of Krampus to all near and far,

Here is to hoping your holiday season is delightfully bizarre!”

Is there a cryptid or urban legend we should talk about? Send it to us via email at aloreing@gmail.com We are always looking for new episode topics and suggestions.

 

Now if you have a cryptid or folktale you want us to cover on air, head over to our patreon. All of our patrons get a chance to vote on which topics they would like to hear and the winners will be discussed the following month. Plus, you will be helping support an indie podcast. To vote on what lore and legends we should discuss, simply go to patreon.com/aloreing and become a patreon today.